Closed doors, open windows

A little over a year ago we closed the door to ever having biological children. I am not doubting God's miracles, we are just no longer pursuing anything with doctors. The day we made that decision was not easy for either of us, and of course he was on the boat-this made it even more difficult for him. Over the past year we have grown in our marriage and for that I am ever so thankful. God continues to show us it is not our way, but His.

After 10 grueling months of living in a travel trailer- whose idea was that?- we decided to buy instead of build. The main motivation for this was that Lance happened upon a house almost exactly what we wanted to build. (God thing!) Words can not express the feeling of being back in a house again. I know the saying says "home is where the heart is", but that tin can kept getting smaller every month!

We reopened our home for foster care with the intentions of just that, foster care. We know that in the future we want to pursue private adopt. However, we want it to be on God's time and not ours. Over and over again He proves that when we push something to happen before it's suppose to we usually get more heartache brought on by ourselves.

Last night God brought sweet twin girls into our home. People may not understand why we do what we do, and that's okay. If you know me from forever ago, then you know my heart is and has always been for children. Especially those who go without the necessities. About 9 years ago my husband started praying for a wife and I started praying for a husband. (Of course neither one of us knew this until about a year into our relationship.) I know God made us for each other, because Lance has that huge heart for children just like I do. All you have to do is hear it in his voice when I tell him we received another call for a placement. (He will deny, deny, deny, but don't be fooled!)

Who knows how long we will have these twins in our home, but I'm pretty sure they'll forever be in our hearts. One of the blessings of opening our home is hearing, "Will you hang it on the fridge?"

When it seems God has closed the door, remember there are still windows to open!

Tied Off

Do not forget to entertain strangers, for by so doing some have unwittingly entertained angels. (Hebrews 13:2 NKJV)


There are days when I wonder where is God leading us next. And just like a child I also ask "Why?" Over a month ago we allowed a stranger, an angel into our home. We have shown her love and planted a seed which we may never see the fruits until our meeting place in heaven.

This angel is still here with us, but we don't know how much longer. There's a term Lance uses on the boat: "Tied off". This usually happens when they have come upon bad weather or rough winds. They have to shove into the nearest bank and wait it out. During this time him and I get to talk more often than other times, because, well, basically he's bored. Lol.

This thought came to me today. Maybe God gives us times in our lives to "tie off" to the nearest tree trunk or piling. During this time we should take the opportunity of being "bored" to talk to our heavenly father more frequently. I stumbled across this verse in Hebrews (see above) as I started a new devotional today focused towards foster care. I know I didn't stumble across it accidentally, but am "tied off" to it for the next 31 days. God continuously reveals and reminds me of why Lance and I are called to be foyer parents. I just need to take the time to listen.

WHY?

A three letter word that I am sure I have heard at least 200 times since June 1st and will hear it a hundred times more:

Why do we do that, Ms. Becka?

Why is that house broken?

Why does she look like that?

Why are we going there?

Why is that green?

Why is it raining?

Why can't I go?

Why do I have to wear these shoes?

Why do I eat this?

Why does it get dark?

Why, why, why?

My answer to many of the "whys" is "because God wants it to" or "because I said so." As I was thinking about all the "whys" it made me think about our relationship with God. For 2 years we asked "why,God?"

Why do others around us get to be blessed to be parents?

Why can't we get pregnant?

Why can't someone ask us to adopt their child they don't want?

Why do we have to go through this trial?

Why do we have to cry these tears?

Why can't we be parents?

Why, why, why?

And the entire time, God was telling us in a still small voice "because I have a plan for you." Yes, we were listening to God. Yes, we were praying. Yes, we were reading His word. But, being a "child of God" we still asked "why". Just like this child in our home and hearts is now asking us "why".

As parents (and I proudly admit we are NEW at this!) we want to think that "because we said so" is enough, but yet we ask the same "why" to our heavenly father. When He says "because I said so, and it's in My word" He wants that to be enough for us, but we struggle with understanding that it is enough.

So, the next time your child asks "why",

remember you're walking in the same shoes (or running in your "fast" shoes)...

12:52 P.M., May 29, 2012

It was at 12:52 P.M. on May 29, 2012 that we received a call and found out we were certified as foster parents!

I give praise to our heavenly Father! I praise Him, because He changed our hearts and in turn our prayers changed. I praise Him, because he has opened doors when we thought doors would never open. I praise Him, because He has chosen us for a child at an appointed time we do not yet know. I praise Him, because He knows the plans and they are not of evil, but of HOPE!

I am thankful for our family and friends who have been with us through this journey and will continue to walk the miles with us.

My heart is overfilled with joy!

I get to be a momma :)

Exciting things are already taking place... some we know, some we don't know. Please keep in mind that I will only be able to share certain information due to the confidentiality of the children who will come in our home. Please continue to pray for us and for the children. We want to give them a chance when they have no chance. We want to give them hope when they have lost all hope.

"Then Hannah prayed and said: "My heart rejoices in the Lord; in the Lord my horn is lifted high..."

 (1 Samuel 2:1a)  

The Power of Prayer

I am witness to the power of prayers. I have to say the most influential body of believers were those at FBC Gueydan. That group of believers BELIEVED in some prayer. I saw the affect of their faith. I have seen my own momma healed by prayers and I have seen families changed by prayers.

As I reflect over the past 2 years of our marriage I can see how prayer has helped us to grow. At first our prayer was to be blessed with our own biological children. Now our prayer is to be blessed with the opportunity to have children in our home. Some, no, most people don't understand our prayer and that's OK. Something I don't share with many people is that according to the fertility specialist invitro is our closest step to biological children. I am not completly comfortable with this idea, so it's one reason we haven't taken that route. I know my God is greater than any doctor and can perform miracles, but I also know he prepares us for things we do not know.. just like he did the Israelites. I just know that I don't want to miss his blessings, no matter what form they come to us in.

I think the knowing we wanted "noise" in our home happened when we hosted the Junior High girls for a D-NOW weekend. We had SO much fun with them in our home! After the fumes of the hairspray, the smell perfume, and they actually left our house we missed them. (I know, who misses teen girls in their home?) I think it was just the fact of having "noise" in our home, besides the 2 of us. Don't get me wrong we are enough for each other,but it was nice having others to share with.

Lance and I are truly blessed in more ways than we ever thought imaginable. This is one of the main reasons we feel lead to be foster parents. There are many children out there who are dealt a bad hand in life based on other peoples choices. We want to be the safe haven for them. We want to show them and share with them the love of Christ. Yes, we hope to adopt in the process... but as a co-teacher described a foster home she once knew... we hope to be a home with a revolving door.

The power of prayer can bring people a long way. Prayer is our way of communicating with the Most High. When we pray we need to remember that it is communication... as I tell my students: communication takes place when one person listens and one person talks and then the roles are turned. Sometimes I think we confuse communication with us being the only ones to talk and God to be the only one to listen. He speaks... we need to take the time to listen.

Cold Water and Microwaves

Good news from far away is like cold water to the thirsty

 Proverbs 25:25

We received a little note from our worker, Ms. B a couple of weeks ago:

We were told that everything was in place... well, that was not the case. As of today, we now have all paper work turned in! She was suppose to staff with her supervisor this morning and then turn it in to the state office for certification. From people I have talked with, once our home study goes to the state it shouldn't be long.

However; God speaks in a still, small voice... He is continuously reminding me in His word that it's all about His timing. AMEN! There is a child out there just for us and I don't want to miss that blessing. So my prayer is that everything works in accordance to His timing.

Thank you to everyone who has supported us and continues to support us! We love you all and are blessed to have you as family and friends.

From Our Daily Bread today...

"Maybe we need to be reminded that some things take time-God's time. ... During that time He prepared them (Israelites), taught them, and challenged them. (Ex. 13-17-18)."

"In our microwave world, we want everything done instantaneously. But sometimes that's not God's plan. Let's seek God's help and learn to accept His timing." 

What's in a name?

Juliet:

"What's in a name? That which we call a rose
By any other name would smell as sweet."

This quote came to me today as family members were discussing why they chose baby names for their children/future children. Where do names come from? Family names, biblical names, favorite actor/actress...

I have names picked out and they are the hope I cling to...  Only God knows our future and what will happen; God knows the children who will be placed in our home as their forever home. These children may not have been born in my womb, but they were definitely born into my heart. God has placed a special longing in my heart to be a mother to child. The most amazing thing is that God has a plan for that child and He is going to allow Lance and I to raise it in His ways.

By any other name the child will still be ours. Even if it's a name another family picked out, that child will still be ours. That child will still "smell as sweet" to our family, because the Lord gives his people a promise.

 "Before I formed you in the womb I knew you,

before you were born I set you apart;"

Jeremiah 1:5 (NIV)

He still Rises (even when we don't )

I am thankful that I serve a mighty and awesome God who continues to rise even when I don't! This a.m. was sunrise service @ 6 @ church... Needless to say I did not rise for the rising of the Son. Here lately I have been feeling drained of energy. (Therefore, I'm making an appointment to have my levels checked... Once again my body is deciding to act up.) I just keep in mind Jesus has risen and helps me to rise even when I think I can't.

It was also brought to my attention this week that we need to ask to be placed on the adoption list at Seller's Maternity Home in Baton Rouge. The question is always asked of me if we want a new baby or an older child. And honestly we will take in any child that God sees fit, because He is the performer of miracles and knows our plans (Jeremiah 29:11). Still the human nature in me, the mother in me wants to have the opportunity to mother a newborn baby and experience all the late nights and not knowing why they are crying. So... this week I'm calling for us to be placed on that list. I know that it could be 2 years or more before any chance of adopting through them... I just feel blessed and find peace in knowing that God has something amazing in store for Lance and mine's life.

The Lord will give strength to

His people; The Lord will bless His

people with peace.

{Psalm 29:11}

A Whole New World

Got a call today to set up a time for my interview... Lance had his the last time he was home. I am excited to meet (let's call her) Ms. B our case worker! I didn't get to really talk to her today. Our call was dropped and my kids came in from recess... I left her a message letting her know my schedule and she's going to talk to Ms. G (the Superivisor) about scheduling an appointment.

It all seems surreal right now. Today I bought the fire extinguisher, plug-protector thingies, and drawer/cabinet child proof locks. Thinking about everything that is needed to finish "getting ready" for children to come into our home seems a bit overwhelming. However; I know in my heart it is God's plan for us and He takes care of us.

So, our world is changing and for the better! We are excited to see the children who will enter our home and pray that we are able to make a positive impact in their lives. Whether it's for 72 hours, 2 weeks, 6 months, or 3+ years.

Quoting Aladdin...

"A whole new world

That's where we'll be

A thrilling chase

A wondrous place

For you and me"

One step closer...

As I'm sitting in the dr's office on this fine rainy morning I can't help buy be excited to be one step closer! I'm waiting in getting a physical for foster care certification. I only have 3 more classes left and Lance will make his up while he's home this time. We will hopefully turn our packet in on Tuesday and await for our home study to begin. For those not familiar with it all a home study is when our worker will come to our home to talk to us and check to make sure everything is in place for children.

I pray every day that God will continue to prepare or hearts and home for whoever He has in mind for us. I want to make an impact on each child whether it's for a day, month, or years!